The Beauty of Tarywile: With almost two weeks on her home turf, our daughter has been to appointments, visited her future apartment and apartment-mate to be, attended family functions and a local adult special needs art class but until last evening, she had not done a stitch of exercise. “I’m too tired.” Somehow, with the intoxication […]
Archives for June 2011
The Strangeness Of Proximity: 6-29-11
Dad Visits The Apartment: Last night, for the first time, our daughter’s dad visited her soon to be new home. We set the trip mileage to zero and drove to the next town. Nine miles, eighteen minutes without traffic, between home and future abode. The tour went well and our daughter was proud to show […]
One A.M. Bedtime and Visiting Gaudi: 6-28-11
Late Nights, Long Phone Calls: Two weeks into our daughter’s vacation, two weeks short of the onset of programming, and the regression begins. This translates into 1:00 A.M. plus bedtime, hours on her cell with a young man northeast of here (this social contact is the good news), and resistance to “taking a walk” for […]
Special Needs Sense of Humor, Without Judgement: 6-27-11
What Do “La Cage Aux Folles,” “Priscilla, Queen of The Desert,” “Hair” and “Monty Python” All Have In Common? On the first Monday after New York State legalized same-sex marriage, indeed a time to celebrate difference, it occurred to me that our daughter and many of her special needs friends have the ability to laugh […]
A Flip of a Coin and The Illusion of Permanence: 6-26-11
So Far So Easy: The new apartment has one large bedroom, clearly the master, with two fairly spacious closets. The other bedroom is a good size with a small closet. This could be a real challenge for two young ladies to come to terms with, but not our gals. At least not initially. A coin […]
Buying Underwear At The Mall: 6-25-11
My Heart Swelled: Yesterday was a pretty femme day, haircuts and two trips to Victoria’s Secret at the mall, the first at our daughter’s request to purchase undies with some graduation money. The second to buy a gift for a cousin, another Victoria fan. As we entered Victoria’s chambers, a patient rang me on the cell, […]
Knowing My Limitations: 6-24-11
Spray ‘n Wash: I am chuckling now because I never knew how to spell Spray ‘n Wash until this post. I was prompted to check the spelling after I saw my daughter take the green bottle from the laundry room to the bathroom to spray her sweatshirt. Watching her spray the areas where paint from the […]
Who Will Teach Her Now? 6-23-11
What Will Happen With Money, Time and Measurement Issues? At our meeting two days ago with the service agency, Ability Beyond Disability, I brought out one of those refrigerator-size white 3-ring binders labeled “Career Portfolio” that Riverview/Grow and our daughter have assembled over two years. The contents include her vocational evaluations from Project Forward where […]
Parents Search For The Best Package: 6-22-11
One Size Does Not Fit All: Our family’s journey to find a suitable adult life for our daughter involved very specific steps from identifying need at an early age with the Department of Developmental Services, fulfilling eligibility requirements for SSI and Medicaid at eighteen, guardianship, and getting our DDS case manager actively involved in finding […]
Tighten The Purse Strings and A New Peer Group: 6-21-11
A Glimpse At The Future: The Ability Beyond Disability team members responsible for staffing and planning the individualized day program visited our home this morning. A portion of the time was spent interviewing our daughter on her interests, social and vocational strengths and weaknesses and signing forms. We were also provided with an overview of her week […]
Sounds Similar, But Don’t Be Fooled: 6-20-11
The Glories of Home: In the last week, since our daughter arrived home, the laundry load has tripled, as she believes that once worn, wash needed. By the way, she can do her own laundry but who has time to stand by her at the washer and dryer when we are running helter-skelter setting up […]
She Rocked The House and Stole The Show: 6-19-11
Happy Father’s Day: We are all happy today. Much has come together for our daughter in the last week. At her father’s birthday party, many friends celebrated the finalizing of the apartment in Ridgefield. Several either live near by her future cozy home, or work nearby. Throughout the gentle summer evening, bits and pieces of […]
Charles Dickens Pays A Call: 6-18-11
A Rich Disparity: Special Needs people are not of one ilk, as those who move in that world know. There is a wide-ranging diversity. Yesterday, driving our daughter for a follow up doctor’s visit for a quick check of TB shot spot (required by the service agency), I put on the 3rd CD from Charles […]
Giving Away The Bride: 6-17-11
Bittersweet: In conversation yesterday with our service coordinator regarding funding, we reviewed what monies would jeopardize our daughter’s qualifications for the government programs she is now receiving. A burial plan was mentioned, which she doesn’t have, but the words went through my veins like ice water. Wow, haven’t gone there before. The mere mention of […]
Keys To The Future: 6-16-11
We Passed: DDS inspected and approved the apartment yesterday. The girls have the go ahead to move in and a set of keys. Ability Beyond Disability expects us tomorrow to complete paper work. The phase of “Adult Independent Living” is officially launched! Funding and Outfitting Questions: In a brief conversation with our service provider, I […]
The Little Cottage: 6-15-11
Real Estate Suspense: I suppose real estate transactions are more similar than different, special needs or otherwise; competing with another offer, seemingly winning the prize, but there is that inspection. Today at noon we meet with DDS at the apartment. All seems in order or easily resolved. Lease was signed. For fifteen days, until the […]
OMG We Got The Apartment, I Think: 6-14-11
Busy First Day Of Adult Phase 1: Our daughter had her lunch meeting with future apartment mate and six ABD team members yesterday at the Olive Garden. The other mother was working so when I showed up with our daughter, the team asked me if I wanted to stay (I didn’t) but I bowed to our […]
The Blossom Award: 6-13-11
All Graduated And Ready For Adulthood, Phase 1: A soggy but sentimental and satisfying Riverview graduation weekend is over. Our little graduate, Grow class of 2011, was awarded the Blossom award for …blossoming this year, into a pretty powerful, ever curious and learning young adult female. A conglomerate of 19 family members, from both sides […]
Off To Graduation Weekend: 6-10-11
Suspense: The other mother and I put in our bid for the modern apartment. Alas, someone else made an offer as well. The owner has to decide which offer to take. We won’t find out until later today. I will be on the road by then, and hope to reach our daughter’s school campus by […]
The Apartment Challenge Continues: 6-9-11
Does It Take A Village To Find An Apartment? What was viewed as a no-brainer a couple of months ago, finding a two-bedroom apartment in the desired complex, is now a daunting task. We have spread our search to other apartment complexes and buildings. The other mother and I, our realtor and the service manager […]
On The Brink Of An Apartment: 6-8-11
Victorian: The other mother went over to check out this apartment I saw on Monday in a Victorian house within walking distance of Main Street. This might work. Spacious rooms, bathed in sunlight, expansive porch and the police station around the corner. It is an authentic Victorian which means a bit old fashion and a […]
The “R” Word: 6-7-11
Slurs: I grew up in a world that was well acquainted with religious slurs, but not the “r” word. Perhaps because in the 1950’s and early 60’s, the world focused on communist threats and racial and religious inequities, leaving the problems of the intellectually challenged for the most part, out of the news. My early childhood […]
Fast And Future Friends: 6-6-11
The Young Ladies Are Busy Tightening the Bond: In one week our daughter will be home, having completed her formal education. Apartment-mates to be, and without anyone’s suggestion, the two young ladies began gearing up for their future together. Age appropriately, they are connecting on Facebook, chatting about boys, and making plans for an outing the […]
Home For Ever: 6-3-11
“Hey Jill its __I am now home for ever:” This was the message on my Facebook Wall from our daughter’s future apartment mate yesterday. After eight years away at her boarding school, she has returned to resume/begin her new life in her hometown. The joy inherent in those few words is palpable. In a week […]
Proving Need, Is It Over Yet? 6-2-11
A New Thought: While tossing and turning over thoughts in the middle of the night, (something to do when you can’t sleep, the dog woke you up, the room is too hot, or you are a partial insomniac, which I am), a startling realization flashed through my brain, zephyr-like and fleeting. I had to catch […]
Momentum Building, It Must Be June: 6-1-11
June Is Busting Out All Over: Looks like the word is out. I am not sitting on my hands nor is anyone else. The Services Manager at ABD (Ability Beyond Disability) called to let me know she is hard at work. A lady after my own heart, she informed me that she likes to get […]